The maid of honor just puked.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
