i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
