There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize