Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
just tell him i said nine months
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I pour the whiskey from now on
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
