May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
