Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
