Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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