It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
