I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
