Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
