Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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