don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize