How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
