Whod you bang
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
