And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
