no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
