I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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