Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I can't trust your balls anymore.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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