I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
