Sry I called you an 8
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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