Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
