I think my vagina is haunted
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
