Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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