that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
