I cockslap morals
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
