We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
