these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize