If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Randomize
