he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
