wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
