Im at strip club and am horny
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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