i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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