id be glad to
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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