it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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