she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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