i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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