Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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