The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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