Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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