Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
