Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
