I cockslap morals
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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