nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize