I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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