we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize