so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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