does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
