he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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