Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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