I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize