Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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